Dirty Dr. Seuss

My daughter has recently been introduced to several new things. Lucky Charms, David Weinstone, deep snow drifts and Dr. Seuss.

While I can say she loves the Lucky Charms and David Weinstone, the deep snow drift did catch her off guard. All I could see was her arms flailing and muffled, “Help me, Mama!!” Not more than two seconds after I dragged her out of the pile of snow did she go back into it with the exact same outcome. Two year olds. Sheesh.

My grandparents are retired librarians with my Grandpa being the retired Dean of Library Sciences for Moorhead State University. (I know my Grandparents live in the coolest named town ever.) If there’s one thing I can say about them, they’re highly educated and LOVE books. When I was a kid, we had tons and tons of discarded library books, new books and my Grandma would even record herself reading books on tape for us. Needless to say, my sister and I have a big respect and adoration of books.

Now Dr. Seuss. For Christmas, my Grandparents bought the kids a few Dr. Seuss books. The Cat in the Hat, Hop on Pop and my favorite, Green Eggs and Ham. (The Lorax and Oh The Places You’ll Go are my other favorites.) Claire insists on reading one of the three every night. She even grabs the book and will read the title as if she’s actually reading it saying “Hop       On           Pop!” It’s adorable.

While reading Green Eggs and Ham for the millionth time I started to think, Cassie, you’re going to have to make these more interesting for yourself, otherwise Claire will start to sense it and in turn not think reading is fun… and then it hit me. Double entendre.

Double entendre –noun, plural dou⋅ble en⋅ten⋅dres

1. a double meaning.
2. a word or expression used in a given context so that it can be understood in two ways, esp. when one meaning is risqué.
Emphasis on the second definition. Risqué. For example:
Would you eat them
in a
Would you eat them
with a
Hmm….continuing on:

Would you? Could you? In a car?
Eat them! Eat them! Here they are.

A train! A train!
train! A train!
Could you, would you,
on a
Would YOU?
Say! In the dark?
Here in the
Would you, could you,
in the
…I mean, most people do…
And finally:
Could you, would you,
with a

I’ll let them answer me for this one:

I would not, could not,
with a

Now see, this way, I get a giggle, Claire gets her book and everyone’s satisfied. (Seriously, no pun intended.)

About Cassie

Two sisters from two misters. What could be more fun?

Posted on February 10, 2010, in Cassie. Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. You’re sick. You much get that from the other side of the family 🙂

  2. I, too, am a child of the Seuss books. My all time favorite was The Birthday Book. I still have a copy, too. “I wish they could do like they do in Katroo!” I used to be mesmerized by the extravagant pictures and wish I could live in that world. (kind of like the “Avatar” geeks.)

    Another favorite was The 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins. (I always went for the more obscure titles.)

    I may have some re-reading to do, to look for the, uh, “hidden” messages.

    • I’m telling you…i look at things all with new eyes! After hearing all those conspericies about Disney movies always being dirty…you never know!

      • I almost wore out my Who Framed Roger Rabbit DVD after I heard that there was supposed to be 1 frame of Jessica Rabbit with her dress blown up. Never did find it though. Stupid rumors…

        But she does have one of my all-time favorite bad movie lines: “I’m not bad, I’m just drawn that way.”

      • OMG, that’s one of Carly and I’s favorite movies. It’s just too much of a masterpiece to not love!

      • Yet another reason I love you guys…

        “C’mon… I’ll bake you a carrot cake.”

      • “Scotch on the rocks. And I mean ice!”

      • OH YEAH! And then the penguin comes back with a glass full of rocks…


        “Tell me, Valient, is that a rabbit in your coat or are ya just glad to see me?”

  3. Dude, I like the way you think.

  4. Hmm… let me see here,

    “If you never did, you should. These things are fun, and fun is good.”

    “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”

    “A person’s a person, no matter how small.” (okay, that one doesn’t work)

    He WAS a dirty bird. I was always suspicious what went on with Thing 1 and Thing 2.

    • You almost have me pee my pants on that last one. Oh Horton hears a who! For an elephant, he really must be less than impressive. That could be a Cialis commercial, what do you think?

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