My name is Cassie
I was talking with Matt between commercials last night during 24 (and was that ever a strange turn of events?!? That chick went from really bad actress to terrorist all in one hour!) and he asked me why the sudden interest in running 5Ks.
I gave him some b.s. answer that was all half thought about how it’s fun and good for me, blah blah blah. But when I went to bed, I thought about it for a long time.
Running, to me, is the one time when I’m fully in control. I control when I start, stop, how fast, how long or how hard I run. No one is there in my ear telling me they need something. I don’t have to think. I’m not in charge of anyone but myself.
Why all the 5Ks?
Because. When I am at home, I’m a Mom, a wife, a house keeper, an enforcer, a mediator, an accountant, sleep deprived, privacy-lost, sometimes pulled to my wit’s end person.
But when I’m running, I’m Cassie. I’m 25 and live in Pittsburgh. I’m 5’8″, have hazel eyes and blonde hair. I like to express myself with body art and music. I don’t like mushrooms or litter bugs. I love to listen to Adagio in G minor in the dark during thunderstorms at the top volume. People who don’t recycle bother me more than they probably should. Granola with yogurt and fruit is awesome. I think this new health care bill is a small step in the right direction. I wish I had a kitchen that was functional. I’m in denial that my stretch marks are here to stay. Seeing someone plant a baby tree gives me happy chills. I really REALLY love to help a good cause. I’ve never liked American Idol (except for one season.) I wonder why in the US, women’s jeans are not by inches like everywhere else. Singing Alone by Heart in the shower makes me feel like a rock star, but makes my husband deaf. If I could save the world, I would.
When I run a 5K, I’m the winner. I’m getting out there. I’m doing something that doesn’t have a prerequisite to be a Mom or wife or nurse. It requires you to run. They don’t care who I am or what I do. They care that I run. I can do that. 100%.
So when I go to functions for Matt’s work, I’ll be known as Matt’s wife and in a few years, when the kids are in school and I’m known as Claire’s Mom or Luca’s Mom, I’ll know that, yes, I am. But my name is Cassie.