the rules of cleaning

I have an asthmatic husband, a white-ish dog, and a black rug. You do the math. Thus the reason I have the Dyson. I love the Dyson. I’ve stated this on multiple occasions. However, Claire decided to kick it up a notch.

I said to Claire, “I’m going to Dyson the floors.”

“Mommy, you have to look fabulous to clean!”


“Here, put this on.”

She handed me some pretties (her name for Mardi Gras style beads) and said, “This’ll make you fabulous.”

I have never been more proud.

Cleaning to me, well, I hate it. I do the basic spot clean and vacuum daily, however, the bathrooms and well deserved kitchen scrubbing…well…hmm. I keep the kids’ bathroom clean. I scrub the bathtub twice a week with baking soda and vinegar (separately, I took science class, thank you very much) and keep the toilet and sink clean.

The ‘master’ bathroom? Well. It has a inlaid plastic crap shower that’s a pain in the butt to clean. And it’s so small and it gets hot and cramped and … and … I’m the WORST at cleaning it. The worst. I wipe off the sink and toilet seat every other day and that’s about it. Gross! Just saying it out loud makes me feel like a guy in a fraternity house.

Oh, and the reason I put master in quotations is because it’s hardly a master bath. When I think of a master bathroom, I think of a big tub and separate shower and two sinks and granite counter tops. What I actually have is a bathroom that is off of the master bedroom and walk in closet. It’s about the size of a handicap bathroom stall, and it has no window. It’s just a small piece of space carved out because newer houses are supposed to have master bathrooms. What a joke.

I Dyson because I can’t stand my black carpet covered in white dog fur. I mop because I hate when I can see foot prints on my nice (expensive) hardwood floors. I scrub the kids’ tub because I don’t want them getting clean in poop water.

These rules just don’t seem to apply to my bathroom. It’s sad, really, but the truth. And silly me, I can’t use the excuse that I can’t clean it because of the ‘harsh chemicals’ because I use natural, fume free stuff. Dang me for wanting to be greener. Dang it. I’m just lazy.


About Cassie

Two sisters from two misters. What could be more fun?

Posted on August 9, 2010, in Cassie. Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. Some day, I’ll post on it, but I am totally “Cleaning Impaired.”

    My strategy is to not make a mess, to the best of my ability, so, no dishes stacked in the sink, no clothes on the floor or laying around, try to keep the clutter under control.

    Because I’m horrible about doing the big things like dusting or cleaning the bathroom.

    Luckily, I have Pinky, who handles most of that. I know, it’s terribly unfair. I’d be happy to clean, but it would have to be on my timetable. (which is, like, every 8 months… whether it needs it or not.)

    Lastly, you two are adorable! Pretties indeed! (And you even have the boy looking over your shoulder…)

  2. “I scrub the bathtub twice a week with baking soda and vinegar (separately, I took science class, thank you very much).”

    That works?

    Believe me. My bathroom would probably make you feel much better about yourself.

  3. Claire is absolutely right. And you both look adorable!

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