What annoys me: commercial edition
Boys, this rant may not be for you. This is about the commercial for Mirena. You know, the IUD birth control? I’m all for it. Birth control for all!! The commercial? Wow, does it ever annoy the piss out of me.
Take a quick look:
First, what woman lets their kids run amok through a grocery store? And me, personally, if I saw my kids doing that with watermellons galore, I’d have a bit of a different look on my face. Most likely it’d be one that looks like this:
Wait, no. That’s not right. Imagine my face scrunched up a bit more and not looking so ‘special.’ Perhaps my hands would be doing the same thing. And I’d probably look really angry. I mean, super mad. Ah hell, look at my step brother and go from there.
Who in the hell allows their kids to play with water balloons in the house? And seriously, how long does it take for her to bring the groceries from the car into the house? Lastly – why are the kids not helping bring those groceries in? Back in my day, Mom would grocery shop, park the car, get out, go inside, yell for us kids and we’d bring them in. That’s the way it works, people! Parents – we have kids so that they can do our grunt work. End of story. (I mean, c’mon. Claire even carries bags in. She’s not even 3!)
Now, I never knew that if your IUD device were to come out, that I’d have to use back up birth control. Never a thought in my head. Just kidding. Sad part is, there really ARE people who don’t realize that, and if they failed to mention that in the ad, then guess what? They’d get sued. Yup. Pretty sure they’d get sued.
Next, we get a lovely scene where the dad is leisurely sitting, enjoying a beverage and some jelly beans reading a paper. So, while his kids, previous to sneaking up and stealing said jelly beans, were running mad in the house wielding water balloons and terrorizing the mother in the grocery store, he’s getting a break. Because, you know, life’s hard with two kids. I’d NEVER know that. And what does he do while his kids are breaking the rules? Shakes his head and smiles. Your kids don’t need sugar! They need Ritalin and perhaps some discipline! (By the way, you’re totally good looking.)
“Oh I think two’s plenty. Maybe.” – Girl, it better be! Those kids are devious and will end up being self-righteous and think that the world owes them something.
Naw, go ahead and have some more. It’s your call. But seriously, get them under control.
And I know, I know. This is totally a commercial to show, rather drastically, about a woman who really doesn’t want to have more kids. Understood. If my kids were that unruly (and perhaps it was caught on a bad day,) I’d be done, too. Who knows! Maybe mine are just prime for all that. I’ll have to raid the closets for water balloons. But seriously, wow. I mean, wow. I get the fact that they are trying to prove a point, but wow, does that actress Mom really have egg on her face. Perhaps a dozen’s worth of egg on that face. Scrambled. Or sunny side up. I’m more partial to over hard. (Naughty!…but seriously, true. I don’t like dippy eggs.)
So every time this commercial comes on, Matt turns it up and says, “Gosh, isn’t parenting so wonderful? This commercial totally embodies all the awesome reasons why I’m glad I procreated. Not to mention, this totally looks like a normal day for us, doesn’t it? Boy, I DO LOVE this commercial.”
And I tell him to shove it.
Ah, young love.
*disclaimer* I am not in any way, shape, or form a perfect mother. However, if my kids were to ever, and I mean EVER, do anything remotely close to what those kids were doing, they’d get such a time out that all of time would stand still. Then they wouldn’t get their after dinner desert. And no tv. See, I know how to discipline. Even if I’m not perfect.