Hello, my name is Cassie and I’m organizationally challenged.
*Sigh* I can’t understand why I can’t figure out what organization is. Dictionary.com defines it as: something that is organized. Wow. Thanks, Websters. But here’s my dilemma. I can’t do it. I’m organizationally challenged. To the max. To be completely honest, if Martha Stewart was willing, I’d preform all kinds of lewd acts for her so she’d fix my home. …in my dreams, I suppose.
I can keep my house clean, that’s for sure. If you guys can remember, when I lost my sanity through Postpartum Depression, I also gained a whole new perspective on life. I gave up a whole lot of things and made some very big changes. For example:
1. High Fructose Corn Syrup does not enter my house at will. If it does, it mysteriously disappears to the trash.
2. Ditto to artificial dyes. I’m looking at you red #40.
3. No chemicals are used to clean my house. I am strictly a vinegar gal these days. And my biffles Nicole educated me on the finer points of making it smell pleasant. Here’s the tip: peppermint oil. I put about 10 drops into one of my spray bottles of straight vinegar and presto. You can’t even tell it’s vinegar at all, in fact, the peppermint scent lingers a bit and it reminds me of candy canes.
4. I make my own laundry soap.
5. I do 60/40 cloth to disposable diapering. Typically it’s only when I’m home. No one else is man enough to do it.
6. I use only organic soaps and conditioners for my kids. Ever since I read about the controversy with Johnson and Johnson’s bath soap being directly linked to cervical cancer in girls…yah, no.
7. Luca’s formula (when he was still drinking from a bottle and I had retired my boobs) was organic.
8. All chicken we consume (which isn’t much) is free range and organic.
9. Speaking of meat, I was super impressed when Matt agreed to this – but I only allow 3 or 4 meat meals a week. Damn you, Carly for making me think twice about everything. However, I’m not the carnivore around here. I hardly eat it even when I do make it.
10. My batteries are rechargeable.
11. We recycle everything recyclable. Technically that hasn’t changed for me since I’m a recycling Nazi from birth. BUT our township recycles cereal boxes and such now. Woo woo. Plus, all paper gets recycled, too. Matt’s big on that, too.
12. Until it turned cold and rainy, I made a clothes line to dry cloth diapers and such.
13. My kids’ vitamins are made from whole food concentrates. Did you know Flintstone vitamins have red #40 in them? Yup. Drat.
So anywho, organization. I totally lack it. (And a basic attention span, clearly.) I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Actually, I blame it on my kitchen. Did you know that my kitchen only has 6 cabinets and 5 drawers? And of the 6 cabinets, only 3 are ‘normal’ sized and by ‘normal’ I mean they make me question the designers’ sanity. And the 5th drawer is big enough for two rolls of tin foil. I think it’s safe to say that it’s hard to work with that kind of…absence.
Then there’s my counter space. I measured it once. I have 150 inches. And of those 150 inches, you have to accommodate for my stove and sink. I have about 20 inches of workable space.
So why on earth would I ever think I could be organized?
Good point, Cassie. Good point.
A few months ago, my Mom gave me a gift card to Thecontainerstore.com and instead of buying something to organize my life a bit, I got a new magnetic white board calendar. Oh – and by the way, Mom – after just typing that sentence, thanks for the hint about how I need to be a bit more organized.
Next – the dining room. I keep my vitamins on there, Claire’s crayons, drawings, puzzles, anything else that finds it way to the table…and we still eat on it every night. That’s talent. What I need is one of those fancy dining room buffet things, but alas, that’s thinking.
Then there’s the living room. Have you ever gone into someone’s house that’s the exact structural match as yours and thought how theirs is so much more organized and clean? (Because those two things go hand in hand, you see.) No? You haven’t? I have. My neighbors’ houses on either side are my twins. Annoying? Yes. And what’s more annoying? Knowing my house is not as different as my personality clearly shows or that my house’s twin is in far better shape than my own?
We’ll just leave that out there.
We won’t even go to the bedrooms. That’s just plain scary. Oh so scary.
So. Martha. Seriously, girl. If you’re reading this, and by the way, if you are, I’d totally pee my pants, help me. Send HGTV. Hallmark Channel. Food Network. Whoever you’re with these days. Please. I’m begging you. Save me from myself.
I seriously don’t want to end up a Discovery Channel special on hoarders or gross homes or something. For reals.