I have officially lost it
Actually, he’s saying either cookie or color. But that’s neither here nor there. I’ve lost it. I’m a woman on the edge. I’m standing at the ledge and looking down.
OK, maybe not that crazy, but I’m a tad nuts.
I’ve never done this before. It sounds weird when I say it out loud. “Nest…ting…” Weird. So not me. I’m typically the kind of girl who embraces rest periods, breaks and down time. However, about a few weeks ago, I began going overboard. I mean, overboard. Things that should have been done in a weeks time were done in one day and I was left paying the consequences of sore hips, butt and back. Now, part of it I blame on myself, the other part I’m going to blame on the tiny human growing in my midsection.
Not only does this little person tell me to eat five cookies after I go to the gym, but it tells me to clean stuff and bake stuff and make impossible dinners. Just sit on a stool while you do it. You can still get it all done today. Why relax? I’m only going to make your life difficult. Get used to it now…
Today I hit rock bottom. I oxi-cleaned my sofa and dining room chairs with a vegetable brush.
A VEGETABLE BRUSH.
I did, however, manage to finally touch up the paint in four different rooms. And I used my old toothbrush to clean the baseboards in the bathroom. And I scrubbed out the fridge. And I stopped Claire from strangulating herself with a jump rope. To her it was a “Tree Climber 3000,” and to me it was a quick death. And I taught Luca the fine art of cleaning up crayons after he fell from his toddler chair in an attempt to get them…it was raining crayons!
Luca’s OK by the way. Just a bruise or two. Claire says it’s OK, because he’s a hockey player.
I wanted to mop the floors while the kids napped, but I thought better of that. Instead I ate an entire box of Annie’s Mac & Cheese and am currently watching an old rerun of Grey’s Anatomy. (Don’t judge me.)
And just on cue, with me resting, feet up and happy, the phone rings. Bah! And of course, by the time I got there, there was no one there.
As a reward, I will now eat cookies. I baked them, so I can.
Again, don’t judge me.