this is war


Oh, Luca. You turned two and I can say now that for the past few months, you have been practicing for this. You do two very well. Very, very well.

However, I know that I don’t make it easy on you. Your little body has all kinds of emotions and it’s hard to sort them all. And then I go and put the potty training into full swing. I took away all of your comfort and you and I are at war. I hate to break it to you, little buddy, but I intend on winning. So you can do your worst, hold in your poop for days, refuse to pee until nap time when I put a diaper on you, but hear you me, child. I will win. Because eventually you’ll get sick of being stubborn. Or at least your bladder will.

And I plan on brining out the big guns should I have to. I bought two packages of cherry essence prunes – your favorite, and plan on using them.

You know how stubborn you are? You held your poop in for a whole day, and the SECOND I drop you off at gym day care, you let it fly. Stubborn little boy.

But I love you. I love your snot nose, your teary eyes, your diaperless bum. I love your tantrums and the way you use your selective hearing to benefit yourself. I love that you are passionate in what you want. Because even at two, you know what you want. You want to play with your trucks, your cars, your dinosaurs and crap in your pants. And I’m only partly OK with that.

Stop crapping in your pants!

The ladies don’t like poo in your pants. They just don’t. It’s not attractive. And I saw that little girl eying you up…that is, until you messed your pants.

You’re doing a good job, though, Duke. You’re doing the best you can. Right now you feel so out of control, and I know I’m not helping matters. But we’ll get back into a routine and it will include you using the potty.

Because, if you ask Daddy, I always win.

About Cassie

Two sisters from two misters. What could be more fun?

Posted on May 25, 2011, in Cassie and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 13 Comments.

  1. Yes. You can tell Luca that even in my dryest of dating dry spells, I still refused to go out with dudes who crapped in their pants.

    I’m kind of proud of that fact, actually.

  2. Mrs. Bachelor Girl, you had me almost crappin’ my pants with that comment 🙂 HILarious!

  3. Oh no. This sounds like the battle going on in our house right now trying to get Sarah to take a bottle…. except way more disgusting. Cassie ftw!

  4. Hey, Luca… Dry britches is fly!

    Just tell him, in the memorable words of Drago in Rocky IV: “I must break you.”

  5. You will win. Moms always do. 🙂

  6. Whoo! Love your new layout. The comments especially look really cool.

    Anyway, holding in poop for days is amazing. The kid deserves to win for that.

  7. War, what is it good for… sing it with me… 🙂 Seriously, this post is hysterical. Watch out Luca, one thing you should know about women, they always win. So take that diaper and use it as your white flag before it’s too late! 🙂

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