the long and winding road
Hey Baby. Yah, you. The one who caused me more than a few headaches and tears over the past 35 weeks, I’m talking to you. I take back anything I may have said that makes you think you’re unwanted. You’re probably the most wanted child I’ve ever known. Yes, there are times when I look around and see nothing but chaos, but then there are times when your siblings put on their own shoes, coats and hats and put themselves into the car and all I have to do is drive.
There are times where they don’t listen and I have to yell, but they also give the best kisses and hugs ever.
You’re going to fit in just fine around here, Baby. Luca tells me every day he can’t wait to sit next to baby in the car and how you won’t have any teeth. Claire can’t wait to help bring me diapers and do the baby’s laundry. Maelie, well, Mae is going to just have to learn to get over it.
There are days where you refuse to move – instead just hanging out there and giving me mini heart attacks. You are lulled by hill and mountain climbs in RPM and squirm when I do chest presses in Body Pump. You’ve allowed me, with time, to continue to do what I love and have been along for the ride 100%. I’ve been the least sore with you and getting out of bed isn’t as painful as it was with the other three.
For the record, you were never unwanted. You were a surprise, yes. But the sadness I felt wasn’t because of you. It was because I was comfortable with life being the way it was. However, if you’ve taught me anything about life, to be comfortable is to be unchanging. And I always want to change, I always want to be better.
It hit me the other day, when during RPM I told the members to add enough resistance to make themselves uncomfortable, because to be comfortable is to stay the same and to be uncomfortable is to make you stronger.
You, Baby, have made me stronger. You have made me learn a lot about myself, things that I otherwise wouldn’t have tried to examine. I found out things I never knew about myself, and I also reminded myself that I’m strong and capable.
Yes, Baby, we’re going to have some of those days. We’re going to have some of those nights. You’re going to make me frustrated and maybe even make me cry. But that’s life. And our motto around here is to suck it up. Complaining gets us no where (though a welcomed outlet sometimes) and just plowing through is sometimes the only thing we’re able to do. I can live without sleep, I can live with a sore body, I can live with a heavy car carrier. What I can’t live without is you.
So you hang on to that thought, Baby, as you finish up in there. And I’ll be waiting for you.