A healthy egoism
Last week a friend posted one of those photo quote thingies that I usually avoid ever reposting or posting in the first place, but it really spoke to me.
But, later I realized, it seemed more that I was all, look at me! I’m thin again!
Rest assured, that’s not how I meant it.
And further rest assured, I’ve got plenty of jiggle left to rid of. One doesn’t simply have a baby and then come back with washboard abs. I will, of course, work as hard as possible to get them back, but no, I do not have them yet. Gym clothes with a wide waist band are great for holding in the extra jiggle.
I got positive compliments, but I’m sure I got several eye rolls. Which is cool. There are times when someone will post a photo of themselves all cut and looking good and I get a twinge of jealousy. Or a fantastic race or run train time. Even that their kid is sleeping fantastic at night. Jealously comes from all different places, and I’m willing to admit when I feel it, which is more often than I probably should.
Truth be told, I worked my ass off my entire pregnancy to be able to be where I’m at physically. But I was reminded that I still have a long way to go, as I was groaning on the RPM bike last week, a friend said to me, “Yah, it’s hard getting back into it, isn’t it?” All that comment made me do was add a whole lot more resistance and push through.
It’s not going to happen overnight. I know this. I did, however, keep myself in check for the nine months I was pregnant because I knew that I wanted to have a leg up when March came around. Is it for every pregnant woman to do what I did? No. Is it realistic? Hardly. But I did what I wanted to do and I’m on the other side feeling pretty good about myself.
Is that a healthy egoism? Well if that isn’t, then I don’t know what is.
When I see someone post their fantastic run time, I check myself and then remind myself that I’ll get back there. I reevaluate where it’s coming from and tell myself that yes, I had a baby, but also, I am me, not them and I can only do what I can do.
Am I proud of where I’m at right now, almost 3 weeks postpartum? Yes. Yes I am. Did I earn it? Hell yes.
That is to love myself.
Now to overwhelm you with photos of the baby.
My squish face…