Common sense and compassion

One thing I try to do over here at Sisters from Different Misters is to not talk about my personal beliefs and politics. If you’ve read me long enough, you can pretty much connect the dots and figure that I’m an educated liberal who believes in being kind above all things.

I try not to let politics define who I am. I’m so much more than Dem or Republican. So much more than black and white. I am a person who attempts to put myself in someone else’s shoes to see how it would feel. I’m a person who thinks common sense is paramount as is compassion and patience. Lastly, who are we to judge?

I have a hard time telling someone they’re wrong simply because I don’t believe the same as they do.

But when it’s something having to do with saying, “I can have this, but you cannot, because you’re different and icky,” I say you’re wrong.

Why is it that I got to marry the love of my life, yet some people out there have to fight to get a domestic partnership? Why is it that some have to petition and protest and be called all kinds of degrading things just to have a normal life? Why do we call some people bad for following their heart, compare them to dirt and scum and throw hot coffee at them as they fight for a marriage?

Nothing about that is loving or kind.

Last night before I went to bed, I was happily overwhelmed by how many people were changing their profile pictures to support marriage equality. But of course, there were the few naysayers out there saying how it was ‘stupid’ to think that by sharing photos, changing profile pictures, or even supporting the idea was bogus.

I thought about it all night, to be honest. And at Audrey’s 6 am feeding, I finally put pen to paper, er, facebook:

“I understand that by simply changing my profile picture I’m not doing anything directly to help the Supreme Court make their decision. However, by caring enough to change it and show support, it means I am teaching my children how to love and respect all kinds of people and that I am a person who loves and respects all kinds of people. The Supreme Court is one thing, but I am trying to stop hate and teach love at the source – the next generation. So yes. I support marriage of all kinds, family and love. Pass it on.”

I. Me. I am doing what I can as a parent, and as a human being, to try to stop the hate and the discrimination. Years ago, people fought for marriage equality in the form of interracial marriage. Why should the color of your skin determine who you get to love? So I ask, why should your gender do the same? Love is love. Some look their whole lives for love, and to deny someone that right to be recognized that most couples take for granted is wrong.

One day, one of my kids may come to me and tell me they’re gay. So goes life. I will still love them as much then as I do right at this very moment. And I hope that if that is ever the case, I get to dance at their wedding.

They are my kids, I love them. Nothing will change that.

Please think twice before you judge or hate. Who are you benefiting – but mostly who are you hurting? And is it worth it in the end?

About Cassie

Two sisters from two misters. What could be more fun?

Posted on March 27, 2013, in Cassie. Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. I’d say that to start trying to change things in your own life and teach your children that discrimination and hate is not the right way is as important as trying to change something via politics- in the end, both things are necessary to really change the world!

    To be honest, I really don’t understand when people hate on other people based on their sexuality, gender, skin-color etc. I just can’t grasp their thinking! How come some people really think other people are worth less? Big question for me…

    If people have different opinions than I have – fine with me, and often I benefit from different point of views. But people with opinions and beliefs that are discriminatory, racist, sexist or just hateful in general are the ones I really strongly dislike and don’t respect – I don’t hate them, but I don’t tolerate intolerant opinions and behaviour, if that makes sense. There are just so many examples in history for the fatal consequences of hate and intolerance to just let it pass …

  2. What always gets me is the argument that they “shouldn’t get any special treatment,” completely overlooking the intellectual disconnect of claiming that being treated the same as everyone else is somehow “special treatment.”

    Rock on, Supermom…

  3. You know I have to be mum on Facebook on any kind of topic like this, but I agree 110% with you. I’ve read through all the “traditional marriage” arguments with an open mind, but even then it still makes no sense to me logically, and especially not compassionately. Anyone who has truly known a gay person knows that they are just like everyone else with a great capacity for love, and they deserve to be able to marry and enjoy the same benefits of marriage straight couples do. It boggles my mind that people are just so against this.

  4. Yay to you and Bluz for writing about this. It’s close to home for me. Our 21 year old son happens to be gay. He told us when he was 17. No big deal. He’s taken a few years to figure out how to navigate life and he’s one of the most well adjusted people I know. He has all kinds of friends and they all love him dearly and he loves us that much more for accepting him for who he is and unconditionally loving him. Duh? Like that was ever in question. Our daughter likes men and women. She’s educated me a lot since she is a capital F Feminist. Do I care about my kids’ sexuality? Not even a little. Do I want my kids to find someone special who will love them? You betcha. Do I remind them that while I don’t care who they select as a special someone to spend their lives with, I do care that they’re not off the hook for grandchildren? Yep.

    • This makes me so very happy. Seriously. Gay, straight, who cares? Find someone you love!

      And yes, while I never push kids on other people because it’s not for everyone, they still better consider it to make you happy 😉

      • Yeah, I know I cannot push kids on them. And they tell me that all the time. I’ll be content with being a great aunt and honorary grandma to friends’ grandkids if my kids don’t want kids. I will respect their decision. I strongly believe that friends are the family you get to choose! Great post by the way about Mae. Each one of your kids are so darned cute. Can’t wait to see more Audrey photos too!

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